Challenges

I am finding Lent to be very hard this year. I think it's because I've been either too worried or too sick to think too much about it. I've really been trying, but I'm just not into it.

The challenges that come along with having two young children, a husband that works hard, and no family around while being pregnant with another little one is really getting to me this week. I'm trying not to vent on here, but it seems like this is a good outlet. (sorry you'll have to hear a little whining) Really all I'm asking for today is prayers. I could go on and on about how tough it is and how I feel like I am failing at so much these days, but in the end I know everyone would say the same thing.

This is pregnancy. It won't last much longer. Take care of yourself and the baby. Just do the best you can. Blah, blah, blah.

I really do know that somewhere in the back of my head. But for now it's just a bit rough and hard to think that way. It's weeks like this that I sure wish I wouldn't have given my mom such a hard time when I was a teenager about being such a whiner and so emotional. I GET IT MOM. When she said "someday you'll understand" well that is now, I don't need anymore understanding. :)

For now I am just going to put one foot in front of the other and do the best I can. So much for being super-mom for now I'm going to settle for just get through it mom and hope that tomorrow and every day afterwards will only get better.

I'm still counting my blessings and all these little ones around me continue to bring a smile to my face. It's how I know God loves me and is holding my hand through all of this. I hope you remember that on your hard days. He truly is always there, sometimes you just have to look around.

Big News...

It’s amazing how excitement and joy can turn into paralyzing fear in mere moments. A paralyzing fear that can last until that excitement and joy return.

Brian and I are happy to announce that we are expecting our 4^th baby in September!!!!

We would have liked to share our news earlier, but there have been some scary complications that we’ve been dealing with. I went in for a dating ultra-sound around 10 weeks and we found out that the baby was perfectly healthy, but there was a large blood clot floating in there as well. I hadn’t had any bleeding or cramps or anything that would suggest this and the doctor was a little surprised at that. He explained that the risk of miscarriage went up and that all I could do was take it easy and pray. Not the thing you want to hear as an expecting mother, especially one that wants to be as controlling as me.


Ever since I lost Emily pregnancies have been a time of joyful nervousness. When I lost Emily I had this gut feeling that something was wrong. With Eliza and Jackson I did everything I could to make sure they would make it. I took hormones at the beginning of pregnancy, tried to eat well, took prenatal vitamins, and even enjoyed throwing up. (B/C it meant that things were going well, according to the doctor)


This pregnancy is much the same. I’ve been puking my guts out for weeks now, and just when I thought it was over it started back up at the beginning of this week. I know it’s just God’s way of reassuring me, but it’s really not fun! We went in for a high-tech ultra sound yesterday, and knowing how nervous I was (maybe b/c I was shaking on the table) the tech checked the baby and the heartbeat first--everything looked great. Not only did the baby look great but the blood clot was almost non-existent!! We could not have received better news. Prayers truly were answered. Praise God!!!!


My excitement and joy returned almost instantly. Brian commented that I was truly smiling for the first time in 3 weeks. Even as I was hanging my head over the toilet last night all I could think was “thank you God for this precious angel you have blessed us with”.


It’s funny the thoughts that you have at the beginning of pregnancy. I think if you’ve lost a child the thoughts are a little different. But even those of us that have lost a child have those thoughts of doubt and fear about what’s to come and what will be when this child is here with us. Then later when you hear you might lose this child, you think to yourself “how could I think about this in a negative way at all”.


I look at pregnancy as this long journey that has the most rewarding ending. I feel so blessed to be on this journey again. Hopefully, from here on out I will do a better job of keeping my blog updated. J


Thank you for all the prayers!! We couldn’t be more excited about our 4^th child that will be joining us in September.

It's Been A While

I know posts have been lacking the last couple weeks. I promise there is good reason! However, you're going to have to wait just a while longer.

I hope to update everyone next Monday the 27th. Posts should start back up daily or at least every other day then. :)

Have a blessed week!!

My Husband

I feel like we always here about how hard stay-at-home moms work and how much they have to do on a daily basis. I totally agree that we have a lot going on and that we DO deserve thanks and appreciation that is sometimes lacking. (Ok a lot of times lacking) Today, though, I’d like to talk about the husbands.


Those wonderful men that wake up early and sometimes drag themselves out of bed to go to work AGAIN always in anticipation of the weekend. How often do you say thank you to your husband?


I don’t think that husbands and wives thank each other enough for the work that they do. It’s hard to put yourself in the other persons shoes because you both are so exhausted by the end of the day that you are doing your best to put one foot in front of the other as you get kids ready for bed and drag yourself to your own pillow.


Sometimes I try and imagine what our lives would be like if I was the one going off to the office and Brian was the one staying home with the kids. (please don‘t laugh too hard at the idea) It just wouldn’t work in our household. God designed our family to run just how it is running now with me at home with the kids and with Brian at the office slaving away day in and day out.


How often do we housewives think our husbands just don’t get how hard we work? I find myself thinking that more than once during the week. I can almost guarantee that my husband never thinks the opposite though. He’s just not that kind of guy. He goes to work every day, works hard, and then comes home and helps out most of the time. I have never heard him complain about working too hard and doing too much for the family. (Maybe it’s because I’m just that good at thanking him??)


Brian and I grew up together and I never thought I’d be saying I wish I was more like him. He is the most even-tempered person I know. He is logical and calculated in every decision he makes from what to eat for lunch to what car to buy. It drives me crazy! I like to fly by the seat of my pants. I’m one of the most passionate people I know when it comes to almost everything little or big. I make rash decisions all the time and I can’t stand “analyzing” things to death.


But I wish I were more like my husband, Brian when it comes to complaining about work. I might not do it out loud all the time, but I do it in my head a lot. I have come to learn that complaining is much more of a female trait than a male trait.


So basically what I’m trying to say is THANK YOU Brian. Thank you for doing what you do. Thank you for being who you are. Thank you for driving me crazy some days. Thank you for taking such good care of our children. Thank you for taking even better care of me. Thank you for being my best friend. Thank you for seeing me through the happy times and even more for seeing me through the sad times. This life would be such a hard thing without you by my side! I love you.
　

God's Army

Abortion, sterilization, birth-control, Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure, Planned Parenthood, HHS, pro-choice, pro-life, women’s rights, religious rights, government interference…


The list of words that are at the top of news columns this week could go on and on. In my eyes the argument seems so simple that I am stunned and physically sickened when I hear someone “arguing” for women’s rights. I’ve never understood why pro-abortion individuals insist on arguing for murder. Yup, I said it… I called the “pro-choice” pro-abortion and I said they are all for murder. Can you argue with me?


Aside from the abortion issue, there are many other current issues that bother me. How can someone contribute to an organization like planned parenthood?

“Planned Parenthood has been found to have engaged in fraud with taxpayer dollars, to violate abortion laws, to push teens into abortions without their parents knowledge, to cover up cases of sexual assault and child rape, to pressure women into having abortions, and to aid and abet sex traffickers.” (life news)

I read one article this week where they did an interview with a former employee of Planned Parenthood. She was also on Huckabee explaining her experience. (Abby Johnson) She explains that she witnessed an abortion taking place and when the probe was inserted into the uterus the baby tried to move away from the probe, as Abby put it “the child was fighting for it’s life and then it was just over”. She goes on to explain that Planned Parenthood is all about making money, not helping women. The encourage women to have abortions and push women into the procedure before they have a chance to think about it.


If you haven’t heard the recent news about the Susan G. Komen foundation and Planned Parenthood (maybe you’re living under a rock?) I encourage you to do some research of your own. As for me, I wont be supporting either group.
I don’t view the HHS issues

or the Planned Parenthood/Komen issues as “Catholic” issues. I view them as human issues. We, as human beings, are called to a higher standard. Jesus Christ came to this earth to die for ALL of us. How dare we turn our back on any of HIS children? This should not be women rights vs. religious rights. This should be about women standing up for what is right.


As I explained to one friend this week, there is only one moral code. Individuals don’t get to choose their own moral code. We all must follow God’s law because in the end He is all that matters. I will remain a warrior for God on earth and I will continue to fight for Him and His glory. I hope that you will do everything for the greater glory of God as well. I’m asking you to continue standing up for what is RIGHT, continue being a warrior for God. In the end, His army will prevail.

Don't forget to count your blessings--especially the small ones!! :)